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Silent But Deadly.....
Aigéan leaned back in his chair, which gave a creak of disapproval. He threw his feet up on the desk and leaned farther back as in defiance of the chairs protest. The pain throbbing between his temples drew him away from his work, his lame, boring, official, and evidently, important work. A quick glance around the room revealed what he was looking for, a tall glass bottle filled to the top with a warm gold fluid. A sharp stab shot into his brain as he reached for the bottle. He settled back into his chair and with eyes closed pulled the cork and took two long pulls on the golden liquid. Relief flowed down his throat into his stomach and drifted back up into his head. He thanked his father for teaching him how to steep ivies, tree bark, and flowers to create a natural aspirin.
"Waffles", the intercom came to life, "Do you know where that stapler of Finster's ended up?" It was drazed. Waffles leaned over and hit the button "You mean the stapler that I let Finster have when i took some time off? That stapler?"
"Yeah, the red Swingline. Seen it?"
"Ummm.... I think I might have, possible in the storage unit on the maintenance deck."
"Sweet, could you go get it for me?"
"What, really? Are you serious?"
"Yeah, I'm busy."
"Fine, but you owe me, big, like Serco Ale big."
"Damn, that is big, thanks."
Waffles was already putting his shoes back on before drazed finished talking. He stepped over Mr. Burney, who was curled up on his Big Mamma's Scratch-O-Rama. He begin to purr involuntary with out even waking up. "Goofy ass cat," Waffles nearly whispered. He reached the corridor and headed toward the lift and made his uneventful way to the maintenance deck.
He reached the storage unit and opened it. Inside was a desk and row after row of boxes and crates. He walked over to the desk and began to search the registry for the crate he believed the highly desired stapler was in. He found the row and the pulled the crate free. The synth-steel box probably weighed 30 pounds. He placed it heavily on the desk. An old chair was placed near the desk and he pulled it close so he could sit while he sorted through the crap in the box. He evidently pulled it too close and slammed his knee against a protrusion under the desk. Cursing, Waffles nearly fell over backward from the pain. "SON OF A..." He yelled to no one and began the search for the red Swingline. After a short while he found what he was looking for and placed the crate back in the correct spot. Inside the only drawer of the desk was a log and he signed out the 'artifact' and replaced the log.
He stood up and headed for the door. He reached for the door knob as it began to turn on its own. Curiously he watched the door open. Six station security guards rushed the room and two of them men tackled Waffles causing him to drop the stapler. Waffles started to smile out of pure amazement. "Clear" echo through the room as the remaining four security guards checked the room. "Sorry about the Sir, but we had to be sure you were clear of any danger."
"Danger? It's just one stapler, I like to think I could have handled it."
The guard looked at Waffled blankly for a second the responded, "Sir, if your the only one in here, why did you set off the silent alarm?"
"THATS what that was, oh man, does drazed owe me really big now! Like file the paper work on this one, big."
"Waffles", the intercom came to life, "Do you know where that stapler of Finster's ended up?" It was drazed. Waffles leaned over and hit the button "You mean the stapler that I let Finster have when i took some time off? That stapler?"
"Yeah, the red Swingline. Seen it?"
"Ummm.... I think I might have, possible in the storage unit on the maintenance deck."
"Sweet, could you go get it for me?"
"What, really? Are you serious?"
"Yeah, I'm busy."
"Fine, but you owe me, big, like Serco Ale big."
"Damn, that is big, thanks."
Waffles was already putting his shoes back on before drazed finished talking. He stepped over Mr. Burney, who was curled up on his Big Mamma's Scratch-O-Rama. He begin to purr involuntary with out even waking up. "Goofy ass cat," Waffles nearly whispered. He reached the corridor and headed toward the lift and made his uneventful way to the maintenance deck.
He reached the storage unit and opened it. Inside was a desk and row after row of boxes and crates. He walked over to the desk and began to search the registry for the crate he believed the highly desired stapler was in. He found the row and the pulled the crate free. The synth-steel box probably weighed 30 pounds. He placed it heavily on the desk. An old chair was placed near the desk and he pulled it close so he could sit while he sorted through the crap in the box. He evidently pulled it too close and slammed his knee against a protrusion under the desk. Cursing, Waffles nearly fell over backward from the pain. "SON OF A..." He yelled to no one and began the search for the red Swingline. After a short while he found what he was looking for and placed the crate back in the correct spot. Inside the only drawer of the desk was a log and he signed out the 'artifact' and replaced the log.
He stood up and headed for the door. He reached for the door knob as it began to turn on its own. Curiously he watched the door open. Six station security guards rushed the room and two of them men tackled Waffles causing him to drop the stapler. Waffles started to smile out of pure amazement. "Clear" echo through the room as the remaining four security guards checked the room. "Sorry about the Sir, but we had to be sure you were clear of any danger."
"Danger? It's just one stapler, I like to think I could have handled it."
The guard looked at Waffled blankly for a second the responded, "Sir, if your the only one in here, why did you set off the silent alarm?"
"THATS what that was, oh man, does drazed owe me really big now! Like file the paper work on this one, big."
This really happened to us at work the other month, except it wasn't me that hit my knee, but i did almost get tacked by 6 cops. HYSTERICAL!
Oh and it really does exist: http://www.shopfatcat.com/bigmasc.html My cat, Mortimer, has one. And it's awesome! Well as awesome as a scratch pad that the cat likes to sleep on can be i guess.
Oh and it really does exist: http://www.shopfatcat.com/bigmasc.html My cat, Mortimer, has one. And it's awesome! Well as awesome as a scratch pad that the cat likes to sleep on can be i guess.
Haha! This is great >.<
Ive only just discovered the message board section now.
Illia Volyova
Ive only just discovered the message board section now.
Illia Volyova
Begone, ye foul incarnation! I banish thee back to the underworld from whence you came!
(Seriously, what's with all the thread necromancy today? Another lock, please?)
(Seriously, what's with all the thread necromancy today? Another lock, please?)